27 May London
It was that café. The one with the faces of musicians tacked on the wall, home cooking sign in the window. Black Swan was on from the album Nina Simone Live at Carnegie Hall. I hadn’t heard it in a long time and it gave me a strange feeling; it took me way back to 1963, sixteen years old, holding that album in my hand and weeping to that song, conscious of the miracle of Nina Simone. And she was very much alive, angry, and vibrant, and now she’s dead and I’m still here. I don’t know why that gave me such a chill. So many souls who were alive now are gone. Nina, William Burroughs, Bobby Neuwirth, Sam Sheperd, Robert Mapplethorpe…one dead friend after another, another mentor, another star. It was a momentary feeling, a kind of compressed sense of time.
I ordered black tea and a version of apple pie- a lot of cinnamon, which I love, but a bit doughy. In any event it was just something to justify me sitting there for as long as it would take to write this, and then return a few steps away to Premises Studio. An historic cluster of rooms for reasonably priced rehearsal space, where Nina Simone once played on their piano.
I am doing six dates with my trio, my son Jackson on guitar, Tony Shanahan on bass/ keyboards and English drummer Seb Rockford on drums. The fellows set up while I wrote. We’re trying some new things and dusting others off. Boy Cried Wolf. A song for the Children, the Led Zepplin song that found its way into The Melting and Don’t Say Nothing for the great poet/ activist Allen Ginsberg. That song was written by me and my drummer Jay dee Daugherty when Allen lay dying in his loft in the East Village during the garbage strike. I guess around 25 years ago. And I was thinking about Allen’s activism and how many things have happened that he would have stood against, so many things since his passing, that fall into numb/dumb silence. And I was just sitting there listening to Nina Simone, thinking of the 18 children in Texas, picked off with an automatic rifle by a teenage boy. And I imagined 18 swans, and a horrifying target practice originating from the belly of hell.
I came back from a bookshop today where they gave me a bag, it says: "Books are biscuits (or let's say cookies) for the soul". And here I find myself having apple pie with Allen Ginsberg. And I remember this specific chapter of first encounter in "Just Kids". Creators like Ginsberg are immortal; the writer is, though pretty obvious, as my father used to put it: "Wer schreibt, der bleibt".
Thanks for this one, Patti
Thank you for writing this. I had the good fortune to see you in Austin on May 7th. Wow. You don't know how meaningful that evening was for me and how happy I was to finally get to see you. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and writings with the world all these years. Thank you for the acknowledgement of the Uvalde schoolchildren - our mournful puzzlement of the state of the world.
Here’s to the souls, on both sides, leading us away from the lone gunmen crimes of our time. I imagine the essence of all those, loved and gone, swirling around and doing their best to make things bearable, more artistic. Love is eternal.
So many things that fall into numb/dumb silence - I realize that we shouldn't stay silent. But what words should we use? Stop? Folks don't even obey red traffic lights much less the word stop.
Thank you for your writing. The way you do this resonates so much with me. Thank you for you.
Hello Mim (my inspirational mother) I thought about you on Mother's day. I imagined your smile and your sweet giggle and your glow of love for your children and your mother. 🌹
It's wonderful to hear about you touring with Jackson. It brings a big and lingering smile to my entire being. I remember the very first time I saw you on television. You were on a late night talk show. Maybe David Letterman. I remember being mesmerized by your adorable demeanor. But what really struck me was your most brilliant smile that extended beyond your being, and your generation. Smileshine warms like sunshine 🌞
✉
Charlie Parker looked like Buddha
Charlie Parker who recently died laughing at a juggler on TV
After weeks of strain and sickness
Was called the perfect musician
And his expression on his face
Was as calm, beautiful and profound
As the image of the Buddha
Represented in the East — the lidded eyes
The expression that says: all is well
This was what Charlie Parker said when he played: all is well
You had the feeling of early-in-the-morning
Like a hemit's joy
Or like the perfect cry of some wild gang at a jam session
Wail! Whap!
Charlie burst his lungs to reach
The speed of what the speedsters wanted
And what they wanted was his eternal slowdown
A great musician
And a great creator of forms
That ultimately find expression
In mores and what-have-you
Musically as important as Beethoven
Yet not regarded as such at all
A genteel conductor of string orchestras
In front of wich he stood proud and calm
Like a leader of music in the great historie Worldnight
And wailed his little saxophone
The alto
With piercing, clear lament
In perfect tune and shining harmony
Toot!
As listeners reacted
Without showing it
And began talking
And soon the whole joint is docking and talking
And everybody talking —
And Charlie Parker
Whistling them on to the brink of eternity
With his Irish St. Patrick Patootlestick.
And like the holy mists
We blop and we plop
In the waters of slaughter and white meat —
And die
One after one
In Time.
And how sweet a story it is
When you hear Charlie Parker tell it
Either on records or at sessions
Or at official bits in clubs
(Shots in the arm for the wallet).
Gleefully he whistled the perfect horn
Anyhow made no difference...
Charlie Parker forgive me.
Forgive me for not answering your eyes.
For not having made an indication
Of that which you can devise.
Charlie Parker pray for me.
Pray for me and everybody.
In the Nirvanas of your brain
Where you hide —
Indulgent and huge —
No longer Charlie Parker
But the secret unsayable Name
That carries with it
Merit not-to-be-measured
From here to up down east or west.
Charlie Parker
Lay the bane off me
...and everybody.
- Jack Kerouac
Patti, you have such a beautiful way with words; thanks for sharing your experiences and thoughts! take good care..
Love the notes on Nina Simone. She was an incredible, diversified singer. I feel badly that I only got to know the majority of her work after her death. I like the photo you took of the studio entrance. An open door with a security gate and an ever present security camera. Bit ironic.
Momma it's not my place to bug you but guess who's front row for your Fulda Germany gig?!
Thanks for listing those friends you care for and who influenced you in some way. It's good to share grief, which all of us are very prone to these days, as there is so much loss, of so many kinds. When AG died, as director of the Poetry Center at Long Island Unv./CW Post, I helped set up a memorial tribute for Allen and read the poem of his the New Yorker published right about then in tribute. There was a local band who performed with power and feeling, but I forget their name, as I have been gone from the Island for 18 years and yes, I'm losing some memory, but not nearly all of it so far! Thank God Allen's friend Bob Dylan is still with us, writing and performing great poems.
I should have said "songs," but many of Bob's songs are poems set to music.
Thank you.
Brought tears to my eyes 💜
Such a powerful entry.
'a compressed sense of time'. I feel this now. As I await my Mum's results of a biopsy, my childhood seems so close. Life framed by death.
I'm going to go listen to Nina, now...
Have great gigs, wish I was there, but grateful to have made it to the Royal Albert Hall last Oct.
As I listened to this last night I watched the sky outside my window turn a spectacular sunset red which somehow seemed fitting . This morning it is sky blue and bright holding the promise of a new day ! Grateful for this and for all you share with us !
Last one I promise…Jim carroll on Kurt Cobain, a poem…https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-AREUrNgMhA
I lied….one more…Leonard and Sonny….who by fire…too good to not post………https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=piqKsizxTxs
My apologies Patti, if you’d prefer me not to post these types of gems, let me know and I will stop.
Wow! Thank you!!!
“English drummer”…love the description! I conjure thoughts of Keith Moon, Ginger Baker and Ringo…not a bad crowd!
You would have loved my mother’s apple pie and I bet Nina would love too. Is Lenny not with you? And so many good things have happened since Ginsberg’s passing…rainbows of sexual inclusion in law, not necessarily in the consciousness of America, but things have gone well in some areas of life. My brother can marry his companion if he so wished, just like my wife and I did 28 years ago. I feel good about that. I believe Allen would be happy for that. Regards….and Fred said People have the power! So people…stand up, do some research and vote (whenever and always) your conscience!
Wow, she has such an authentic mind.
I really think she’s had one of the biggest impacts on my life. I got tickets to see her in Berlin for my 20th birthday this year, something I’m so excited for.
Thank you for telling your story, you have a beautiful soul and I think we’re so grateful that you share your thoughts with us. I would love to hear Land in Berlin, it’s my favourite ❤️🔥
Please take good care of yourselves, sending you lots of love and hope.
You’s are the very best that there is out there XXX
I so wished that the time I was in the UK last month allowed by to catch up with your tour. Alas, you slipped through my fingers. I was staying just across the valley from where you will play at Doune the Rabbit Hole in July. Thanks for sharing with us. We have gotten so used to the virtual these last 2 years
The beauty is that they never die, living on in memories that never die, some remembered by many, some by few, but all will bring a smile somewhere amongst the sadness.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and writings while on your tour. It’s a lovely vicarious experience for me & I fully appreciate it. Stay safe.
You never cease to amaze me in your conversations. The discussion that you just posted now was beautiful. That doesn't even come close really. It was heartfelt....Your description is truly amazing.......Yes the boy cried wolf... I could listen to on loup..
I first read about Bob Neuwirth back in '73, in the Joplin bio "Buried Alive." I was in seventh or eighth grade. And that's where I first saw the name of a young poet who was also mentioned in the book, Patti Smith. Many years later I became friendly with the author of that book, Myra Friedman, now gone too. All these years later, these names are still with me, and the idea that in 2022 I'm reading Patti's words as she writes them is nothing short of remarkable.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I know that feeling of melancholy well. First losing friends in the AIDS epidemic, then slowly losing more, especially artists and musicians. Sometimes I feel like their souls can't take it anymore, like they simply can't live in a world where 18-year-olds carry rifles into classrooms full of children... or where reality TV show characters somehow become president. But the rest of us are still here and still connecting, and I'm so grateful for that.
“ And I imagined 18 swans, and a horrifying target practice originating from the belly of hell.”, that’s gonna stay with me, they all stay with me.
Hey Patti- a couple more thoughts. (1) on those you have lost. I read your list and felt your sadness at the loss of so many influential people in your life. But then I began thinking about all the influential people around you right now: Jesse and Jackson, Lenny and Jay Dee, Tony, Michael, and that awesome guitar player you stole back from Bob Dylan. And oh yeah- Bob Dylan. So you know that Buddhism teaches us to be grateful for all we have…. And you have a lot of wonderful people in your world. And also (2) I have heard you so many times at your shows to ‘feel the power in your hands’ and you tell us to use that creative power and put it into action. Thanks for that inspiration- it’s moved me to comstsmt creativity and action- just don’t forget - even in moments of sadness - you have that power, too. ;)
Painful and fleeting moments of love and hatred have been encircling us… and yes, it’s heavy with all of us carrying this world somehow. Some more than others. All the same time trying to keep our minds and thoughts malleable to openness and everything in between that seems impossible to bear. We bear it until we can no longer, we pass it on to those who can carry it for us. Just as I would, my sweet friends I knew before that are no longer. In those memories of who we carry anything for, they live through us still. The thoughts, beliefs & true being of their spirits are still present within us. Carrying it willingly. Teaching lovingly, still.
Even if it’s heavy and hard, carry while you still can. Lovingly, please.
I’m tired.
Painful and fleeting moments of love and hatred have been encircling us… and yes, it’s heavy with all of us carrying this world somehow. Some more than others. All the same time trying to keep our minds and thoughts malleable to openness and everything in between that seems impossible to bear. We bear it until we can no longer, we pass it on to those who can carry it for us. Just as I would, my sweet friends I knew before that are no longer. In those memories of who we carry anything for, they live through us still. The thoughts, beliefs & true being of their spirits are still present within us. Carrying it willingly. Teaching lovingly, still.
Even if it’s heavy and hard, carry while you still can. Lovingly, please.
Sad and angry…like us all Patti! My heart breaksl
Oh my💦🤍💦what a time it is and what a time it was.
Dear patti you were honor to be with Ginsberg as he passed..and the others ..
being earth tied for the moment..death leaves that sad void as it flies., inside me,i am sure we do go well on the other side.
On seeing Madame Nina Simone 60+++ years ago at ..??."The God Bug"....was that the name?...in the village...furiously playing the piano and impressively spitting out lyric...i was then not educated sufficiently to understand why .... though genuinly "god damn" impressed with her anger.
Enough to see still, the details of that night.
Thank you Patti, memorizing all those good people that died. While Nina was singing her heart out. Totally passionate! Thank you! Have a Lovely Tour and your Blessed having yr son with you into the Music too🌺🌹🎶🌷❣️
Thanks Patti, for making some kind of sense of the insanity…
Bless. Thanks
Thankyou for the poetic imagery and remembrance of the hateful mass murder. An acknowledgement of terrible beauty.
Beautiful and moving, as always! Thank you, Patti, for sharing all your feelings and thoughts!
Patti thank you .!!
Your musings... vivid, visceral, packed full of your truths
Honest and visceral. I'm gonna love these tour dispatches.
Beautiful!
Always love hearing your thoughts, where you are at with things and your voice. ❤️
Thank you Patti, I loved the first installment of the tour diary. ❤❤
I was there, in 1964, listening to her Mississippi Goddam and My Heart at Thy Sweet Voice.
Thank God, those in charge, whoever it was that allowed us to invent recordings.
strange thing to have to witness these histories and the aloneness they oft seem to bring but truthfully we are all together and the comfort of voice to them awakens us to what will evevtually be transformative 🌿
Je viens d’écouter la reprise de Led Zeppelin 👏👏👏👏
C’est magnifique 😍
Patti, vous êtes extraordinaire 💙☕️❤️
I am rereading "Just Kids" . I had to read some wonderful passages aloud to my grown daughter as I am visiting her in Seattle (we are going together to 2 Dylan concerts) . This morning as I was finishing the book I had to tell her "I was pregnant with your little brother the same time Patti was expecting her daughter, Jesse." Such an illuminating book, Patti. I love that I found you.
I hear where your thoughts are dwelling, Patti, and I take comfort in the ageless repetition of artists who give to the world and then pass on, leaving us their created children. Your country (and so many others) will find solutions to the horrors that plague it.
Hell’s belly refuses to answer any questions.
His portly, pursed mouth suckers in
dismissive of all inquiry.
Ghost-less Hungry for the hubris still yet dripping from his chin,
disappears into a room un-pierced by the eyes of the grieving.
Ah, the divine Nina Simone. Thank you....
Of course I had to put on Black Swan after hearing this🖤
Thank you for your time and for sharing your Tour Diary with us, beautiful lady! The last image touches very deep.
Good to hear from you Patti!
🖤🖤🖤
Again and again, I regret that there is no date in Paris for this new tour since 2020.
I would have liked to hear these tries that you speak of, like this beautiful song that I love, "Boy cried wolf"
I do not despair of seeing you again...2023? 🙏
I love you Patti 💙☕️❤️
thank you. sadly it’s getting harder to feel good about earthlings and life here.
Thanks for taking the time, Patti!
in the Gregorian calendar June 1 is the 152nd day of the year (153rd in leap years) ; 213 days remain until the end of the year and we all want you to travel safe with inspiring adventures to share with us until the calendar starts anew -
Thank-you , Patti for hitting the nail square on it's head. I will never look at swans the same. Your poignant words ring true.
Thank God for you, Patti. The way you listen and the way you share comes straight from the bosom of vibrant, generative, humming, Creation, from the lap of Solace.
This was beautiful, poetic and so nice to contemplate. Thank you!
This is awesome. Thank you, Patti.
Brilliant, Patti. My heart cracked open with the vision of the 18 swans.
Thank you Patti, for that image of 18 Swans, and thank you eternally for the work you do! Will see you in Amsterdam, I can hardly wait. Lenny will be missed though, I am presuming he is on the road himself and hoping he is doing well! Best wishes to all of you.
Thanks, Patti, for putting this diary together for us. I love hearing about your experiences on the road, the songs you'll be performing, your memories and thoughts as you travel the world.
😰
Don’t Say Nothing is one of my favorite songs. I am so glad you’re bringing it to us again. Every time I hear it I have to move, and now I know it is partly the great rhythm and partly because it’s about activism and Allen who would never stop. Thanks so much for the tour diary. It is just wonderful.
blessings on your tour Patti, it sounds amazing! I was lucky enough to see you play many times in England but now I'm 'stuck' in costa rica.. however, i get to share in your blog and videos, so a million thank yous!
Oh Patti, thank you for the privilege of being able to connect with you, hearing from you.
I am so grateful
This is a gem … as are you 💖🦋🌷 keep singing, writing and rocking (loved seeing you so vibrant in the redwoods of HM!)
❤️ 🙏
Love this Patti , thank you
Thanks for keeping us connected to voices of protest Patti , there's much to learn from all of you. And Led Zepplin, looking forward to seeing where that goes. 💚
I wonder which song..
.
got me with this one. xx
Thank you for the Cambridge concert. But why no Lenny or JDD? I hope they are well.
I love your tour diary! Feels like being in London right now! (far from lying in bed with a flu) 🐎
Thank you Patti for your powerful words and perspective; so many powerful individuals gone who made their indelible mark on this world and those 18 children (and the others before, whose lives have been tragically cut short) whose mark on this world is not the one their families could have ever imagined. There is so much anger and hate in this world, and reading your words, or even better hearing you speak is a balm for the bitterness we encounter in our lives. Thank you.
Always inspiring. Can’t wait to see you in Madrid!
So many friends and wise ones are gone. I can identify with that, Patti. And the image of the swans from brilliant Nina Simone’s song connected to those beautiful Texas children, victims of an American massacre, is stunning. Thank you. 💜
patti i want to tell you about my dream. this was in october last year. i was in a beautiful ballroom like a hall you would have a wedding with golden chandeliers. there was a large oval table with maybe a dozen upholstered chairs. there was sinatra or tony bennett playing and people gathering around. i soon realized the people were my family. my sisters nieces nephews even my nieces children and grandchildren. then my parents entered the room .my dad in a tuxedo. my mother in a white gown. my mother was abeautiful lady and she looked radiant with a smile on her face and red lipstick.behind the table was an expanse of windows and the sky was bright. the sinatra music was kinda loud and everyone settled into their seats. everything seemed like 1967 . a time long ago. my parents have been dead since the early nineties and i felt comforted to see them looking so well. suddenly the sky in the window became dark, thunderous and loud winds whipped up out of nowhere.the music changed into the opening chords of land/horses ..johny fell on his knees started crashing against the locker started laughjing hysterically... then horses horses horses the band was thunderous and loud. out of the didtance a group of white tallions galloped in to the ballroom...coming in all directions..white shiny ...studs w..in flames..the horses gaaloped onto the ballroom table and everyone starting coughing and gasping for breath the chairs fell to the floor ,the horses jumped off the tyable and gallloped off into the distance merging into the picture windows behind. as they departed the stallions shit all over the fuckin floor. when they left everyone was dead except me. i just stood there... in november of 21 my sister died of covid in . she wouldnt get the vaccine. she was in some moronic religous group. she took her last breath in the hospital before my eyes. the nieces and nephew all very reliogous have had the virus but recovered. no vaccines even after their aunt died they believed in anti science.. my youngest sister had the omicron for the last week and is on the mend. she had all the shots but was prone to bronchitis. but thanks to the universe she is not gone again.
Wow Patti. Right in the heart. All of the memories we accumulate when we are continuously gifted life each day...
Thinking of the song, All My Heroes Are Dead by Dar Williams. With a deep nod of love for Phil Ochs (Patti, please listen), and thinking of recent musician who died at ages 57, 60, 67, 72, three said to have died from natural causes. Natural? Why so young? And then those schoolchildren murdered along with dreams of their futures. Yes dear Allen could not have imagined the 21st century and the continuing increase of American’s love for guns above all else. Our newest but, sadly, far from unique tragedy inspires Canada’s Trudeau to ban new purchases of handguns. While American Republicans remain unapologetic for their deep need for assault weapons and the Democrats stay frozen in horro, weep, do nothing.
Lovely to hear from you with your wonderful stories and so sad about those poor children. I was then uplifted by hearing you on 6 music talking about your show at Alley Pally in July, your delight at discovering so much new music, then they finished with People Have The Power. Always an empowering song for me. Thank you Patti for being you. Much love from London 🙏
As always your words are so powerful. You pack such a volume of emotions into every post that you share with us. Wishing you an exciting tour full of new and precious memories to add to your treasure trove of experiences. Enjoy. X
What extraordinary writing. If this is what your tour diary is going to be like, we're all in for a fantastic experience. For some reason, I was reminded of the last chapter in the hardcover version of Year of the Monkey, A Kind of Epilogue. I was re-reading it last week and I have to say that it is one of the most amazing passages I have ever read in my life. Just exquisite. So moving and so inspiring. Thank you, Patti, for sharing your gift with us. And, for any of you that haven't read that passage, do yourself a favour and check it out. It is astonishing. Wish I could be there to hear you do Zeppelin. That would be something.
good listening, thanks and greetings from Melbourne Australia - its freezing here and much colder is grief ~ those poor children and their loved ones, how can it keep happening, America !??
Thank you for connecting all of us in this space and sharing your musings. Be well.
Thanks… such a powerful reflection/moment. 🖤
Just what I needed right now, to know that someone else is going through the same thing, thank you!!!
Great to hear from you twice today!! 👍
I found this very moving. Thanks.
hello Patti how can I write you a personal message ...?
❤️
Thanks, Patti.